Hi Joe
I hope you have had a good day and are choosing well how to use your time
Thought this list might interest you
http://shatteredparadigm.blogspot.com/2008/06/23-of-very-best-christian-apologetics.html
Love you
dad
Monday, 29 November 2010
Tuesday, 23 November 2010
Prayer for my reply
Hi I had an half hour chat with a girl called Margo (she's in my german class) at tea and toast in the chaplaincy when I went, she said she felt really unfulfilled by everything she'd tried and we chatted a lot about God and how it's changed me, so I sent the message below and she's replied, just wondering if you could pray for her and also I don't want to rush a reply but want to help her in the best way, love Joe
Joe Garratt 23 November at 01:59
Heyy, I'll see you in german but just wondering how you're getting on since we chatted about feeling unfulfilled and stuff? Joe x
Margo Kane 23 November at 11:29 Report
Oh well, I was like really drunk then haha. I don't normally think about it much unless I'm like in a depressive mood, y'know? And I've been way too busy to think recently. But thanks for checking :)! xx
Joe Garratt 23 November at 01:59
Heyy, I'll see you in german but just wondering how you're getting on since we chatted about feeling unfulfilled and stuff? Joe x
Margo Kane 23 November at 11:29 Report
Oh well, I was like really drunk then haha. I don't normally think about it much unless I'm like in a depressive mood, y'know? And I've been way too busy to think recently. But thanks for checking :)! xx
Friday, 22 October 2010
I have something to discuss!
It's strange when in my mind I know what issue I want to raise in this post, but can't easily put it into words given the nature of the context and complexity, but here goes!
I guess it concerns me and maths and life and expectations and the day to day stuff.
In retrospect, it seems like for sixth form I was always pretty sure about doing maths at uni. Yet during my gap year I had quite a few doubts about that, and various issues like motivation and fundamental identity etc. came up and I was far more focussed on who on earth I was and what on earth was worth living for at the time of my gap year oxford preparation, so I really didn't work much for that but some of the stuff I thought about and then shared with people in Uganda and beyond has changed so much about the ways I can look at life and feel and think, there's this vision of love and new creation and hope that I can really connect to and believe in, and I'd take that over Oxford or money or worldly respect or a feeling of control or whatever anyday, because all those things are only going to die and simply don't compare when it comes down to it and you catch a glimpse of what life could be.
I guess I'm a bit concerned that I can't explain this all that well, and memories of you saying 'why don't you just work until exams then ask the hard questions afterwards?', when I knew that even trying that for a second tore me apart, make me a bit worried that it could look like I'm just raising pointless issues and can't be bothered to work and don't appreciate all your support and am just distracting myself from what really matters with words and unanswerable questions. But I don't have time for that nonsense, if God is real, if love is real, if there really is a hope for us that can outlive death, then there must be so much more than this.
A few times in the last few weeks things lecturers have said have made me feel excitement similar to what I remember I felt often preparing first time round for Oxford, when it felt natural and fun and didn't raise justification questions and was just so different from the second time round and time since then.
And quite a bit recently I've also felt a bit disenchanted with maths and (please be aware that the words I use to try to describe my thoughts, feelings and opinions are usually hard to find and quite often may be misleading just because it's so hard to work out) the question which best describes it is 'why am I doing maths?', and I know a lot of people get that at the start of uni or whatever, but that doesn't necessarily make it any less real.
I find so much related to maths really interesting, like fractals and infinity and dimensions and logic and all that, but I'm really not at all that bothered about getting a 'good job' or doing anything directly related to maths in the future. And I love music and philosophy and languages and history and art and people and ideas and food and beauty and fun and I hate how it's so easy to forget all the incredible things and lose myself in the moment and the system and people forget what it means to dream, and no longer dare hope that they might somehow be free.
Clearly, any of us could die at any second, which certainly puts some things into perspective, but there's obviously the possibility of not dying for however long, so I want to take that perspective and surrender and live how we were meant to live with every breath until then. I don't want this to sound ideological and therefore irrelevant, obviously it's the extreme of the hope and the closest I've been to that future realisation is in moments, but all you need is a glimpse to know it's worth living and dying for.
Um, so I don't really know what this whole maths thing's likely to amount to, I'm quite happy for it to only last a year or 3 or 4 or a month or a day or whatever but at the moment (this is one of the most fragile parts to explain so bear with me) I don't feel inspired/motivated/a desire to do all the work and stuff and would just like to chat about how I view maths and life and me and God and my purpose overall and day to day, because I want to do it better.
Love you
Joe
I guess it concerns me and maths and life and expectations and the day to day stuff.
In retrospect, it seems like for sixth form I was always pretty sure about doing maths at uni. Yet during my gap year I had quite a few doubts about that, and various issues like motivation and fundamental identity etc. came up and I was far more focussed on who on earth I was and what on earth was worth living for at the time of my gap year oxford preparation, so I really didn't work much for that but some of the stuff I thought about and then shared with people in Uganda and beyond has changed so much about the ways I can look at life and feel and think, there's this vision of love and new creation and hope that I can really connect to and believe in, and I'd take that over Oxford or money or worldly respect or a feeling of control or whatever anyday, because all those things are only going to die and simply don't compare when it comes down to it and you catch a glimpse of what life could be.
I guess I'm a bit concerned that I can't explain this all that well, and memories of you saying 'why don't you just work until exams then ask the hard questions afterwards?', when I knew that even trying that for a second tore me apart, make me a bit worried that it could look like I'm just raising pointless issues and can't be bothered to work and don't appreciate all your support and am just distracting myself from what really matters with words and unanswerable questions. But I don't have time for that nonsense, if God is real, if love is real, if there really is a hope for us that can outlive death, then there must be so much more than this.
A few times in the last few weeks things lecturers have said have made me feel excitement similar to what I remember I felt often preparing first time round for Oxford, when it felt natural and fun and didn't raise justification questions and was just so different from the second time round and time since then.
And quite a bit recently I've also felt a bit disenchanted with maths and (please be aware that the words I use to try to describe my thoughts, feelings and opinions are usually hard to find and quite often may be misleading just because it's so hard to work out) the question which best describes it is 'why am I doing maths?', and I know a lot of people get that at the start of uni or whatever, but that doesn't necessarily make it any less real.
I find so much related to maths really interesting, like fractals and infinity and dimensions and logic and all that, but I'm really not at all that bothered about getting a 'good job' or doing anything directly related to maths in the future. And I love music and philosophy and languages and history and art and people and ideas and food and beauty and fun and I hate how it's so easy to forget all the incredible things and lose myself in the moment and the system and people forget what it means to dream, and no longer dare hope that they might somehow be free.
Clearly, any of us could die at any second, which certainly puts some things into perspective, but there's obviously the possibility of not dying for however long, so I want to take that perspective and surrender and live how we were meant to live with every breath until then. I don't want this to sound ideological and therefore irrelevant, obviously it's the extreme of the hope and the closest I've been to that future realisation is in moments, but all you need is a glimpse to know it's worth living and dying for.
Um, so I don't really know what this whole maths thing's likely to amount to, I'm quite happy for it to only last a year or 3 or 4 or a month or a day or whatever but at the moment (this is one of the most fragile parts to explain so bear with me) I don't feel inspired/motivated/a desire to do all the work and stuff and would just like to chat about how I view maths and life and me and God and my purpose overall and day to day, because I want to do it better.
Love you
Joe
Tuesday, 12 October 2010
Powerful drama
Hi, not sure how to turn the link blue and hyperlinkify it, but someone showed me it on the Beach Mission and I just watched it again and found it so powerful so thought you might find it helpful; it's a drama/mime/dance about Jesus and us and sin.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ZSptq57jEY
Love you,
Joe
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ZSptq57jEY
Love you,
Joe
Tuesday, 28 September 2010
Hello
I'm not quite sure of the options in this blog; commenting on other posts etc., so I just copied and pasted your first impressions one into this new post.
Rachel Philips is one of the girls from the CU facebook page who's doing maths and I met her and some of her friends tonight after enjoying dancing around in fluorescent and luminescent stuff, they were all really friendly and one of them in her house is also doing maths and also a christian. I've basically just got back after having an awesome chat with the two of them (talked with others too but they went to sleep earlier), about life, uni, maths, church, and more life, totally personal and genuine and heart-warming and real. Definite highlight of university so far. So anyway, lots more I could say but that'll do for now, if you could pray that I could have more of these open and honest and random and real sessions rather than the comparative waste of time that is compromising in order to try to please others or myself whilst almost bypassing the focus on genuine, free, loving relationship that life's really all about that'd be great!
Liking the blog idea, off to sleep now looking forward to catching up soon.
Love you too, Joe
Rachel Philips is one of the girls from the CU facebook page who's doing maths and I met her and some of her friends tonight after enjoying dancing around in fluorescent and luminescent stuff, they were all really friendly and one of them in her house is also doing maths and also a christian. I've basically just got back after having an awesome chat with the two of them (talked with others too but they went to sleep earlier), about life, uni, maths, church, and more life, totally personal and genuine and heart-warming and real. Definite highlight of university so far. So anyway, lots more I could say but that'll do for now, if you could pray that I could have more of these open and honest and random and real sessions rather than the comparative waste of time that is compromising in order to try to please others or myself whilst almost bypassing the focus on genuine, free, loving relationship that life's really all about that'd be great!
Liking the blog idea, off to sleep now looking forward to catching up soon.
Love you too, Joe
Monday, 27 September 2010
First impressions
I found Saturday a hugely exciting day - settling you into the halls, seeing you meeting new people and your general positive outlook to the whole University experience.
I hope and pray that you have a great time at Bath, exploring Maths, life, relationships and making great friends.
I thought a shared blog might be a fun way to share our thoughts and feelings as well as debate questions that matter and some that don't!!
What do you think?
Hope all's well with you
Love you
Dad
I hope and pray that you have a great time at Bath, exploring Maths, life, relationships and making great friends.
I thought a shared blog might be a fun way to share our thoughts and feelings as well as debate questions that matter and some that don't!!
What do you think?
Hope all's well with you
Love you
Dad
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)